Two wonderully quirky assumptions this week, both making me smile, though for rather different reasons.
The first, part of one of those introductory conversations you have when you meet someone and start to compare background: friends, family, kids… I mention the boy, and how i’ll be keeping him entertained over the weekend.
“Nice”, come back the response. “And who does he live with?”
“Huh? His parents”, i reply, slightly mischievously.
“Oh. So you’re not his parent?”
Er, hang on! This feels like a good point to abandon the direction this conversation seems to be veering in. No. His parents haven’t split. Yes, I’m a parent: and no, i’m not a grandparent.
I am not sure which i find more odd: the assumption that if one transitions, one must automatically split: or that i am a grandparent. Grrrr! Not for a few years yet, I hope.
Next up is another quite similar conversation, with another new acquaintance. Or rather, an old acquaintance who has always previously been ever so clightly arms length. No particular reason: just we haven’t had call to chat intimately…and yesterday, we did.
Friends, partners and offspring, once again to the fore. The boy comes up again, and i mention that he is joint effort by me and andrea.
There is an obvious pause. Wassup? Did i just put my foot in it.
Not exactly: I’ve known said acquaintance for a couple of years now. And she has never known me as anyone except Jane.
OMG! I realise the number of people to whom that applies must now be growing. And she…well, she’s always known me as Jane…pretty much always thought of me as a woman.
So for one brief moment, before realisation set in, she assumed we’d opted for IVF and…was about to inquire which one of us had been mum. I like that.
A fair bit better than being thought of as grandma. 🙂