All you need is …patience

You have been warned.

This isn’t all about transition. Not even trans issues. Unless you reckon that “transport” may have something of the gender queer about it.

Sooner or later i’m going to have to stop being a trans blogger. Not yet. But the day is coming closer.

Pensées: that’s the thing. Insight and wit and associated stuff. Like an ongoing argument chez nous about parking.

On Friday, Andrea set off to Stamford to run various errands. Parking in Stamford is not bad…but on Friday, market day, its not brilliant. For me, no problem. There are several streets in Stamford where there is plenty of free on-street parking for two hours at a go. So i just drive down to one of those and sit waiting.

Sometimes, you wait five or ten minutes. Sometimes, you sit and wait and just as a space comes free, some git zooms up from behind you and nips in. That is irritating, but its also life. I just turn on the radio and regard the wait as a few minutes of me time: a chance to hear a debate or news or a track without worrying about everything else on the road.

Not so andrea: she r4eally, really can’t abide waiting. It puts her in a bad mood. And if someone dare to nip in to “her” space, they are lucky not to be rammed for their presumption. I shall say nothing, this time round, about what she did to the poor middle-aged lady who tried to nick a space that i had been waiting for.

However, it all ended in an exchange of hand gestures that i felt were both unnecessary and highly unladylike – on both sides. 🙂

No. I don’t get it. Parking takes time. Like much else: and rarely is one’s time so valuable that one can’t put aside five minutes in order to achieve calm. Perhaps there’s a monograph in there somewhere: the zen of parking.

Or maybe it is just my inner lizard: like, you don’t tend to have blood pressure of 105 over 60 if things constantly wind you up.

Dunno. Am i the odd one out here? Do others share andrea’s impatience: or can you still go with the flow?



5 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    andrea said,

    the woman whose car i bodily blocked so you could get a space was not middle aged …and she’s the one who called me a twat…I merely reciprocated.
    As it happened I found a parking space immediately on Friday and even managed to parallel park in it.
    The style of parking you do is like slow motion chaos. Partly it may be that there are lots of instances where there is a form of etiquette going on which you blithely ignore (a habit you learnt from your father)… I’ve just not worked out if parking in Stamford is you ignoring the rules or merely a total absence of such.

  2. 3

    I have this strange feeling of satisfaction reading this and knowing that although we’re in different nations and thousands of miles away, the world unites in it’s irritation at the lack of parking spaces, and at gits who steal them from us, ignoring all etiquette and decency.

    I hope the healing is going well for you Jane. There’s now a possibility that my insurance will cover GRS – and I’m sitting on pins and needles waiting for the new school benefits package letter to find out just what trans procedures they will cover.

  3. 4

    Jenny said,

    I don’t do sit and wait if I can avoid it, I’d rather drive around until I spot a space or someone just about to leave.
    People nipping into spaces when someone else is clearly waiting is simply being rude. I’ve seen people almost come to blows on occasion, certainly exchanging words. The party that is in the wrong always coming up with an excuse as to why it is their space.
    What I find frustrating though is when you are trying to leave a busy car park and people simply wont let you out of a space. We were sat for nearly half an hour once waiting until there was a gap in the traffic flow so that I could get out of the space. Dozens of drivers simply ignored the fact that I was waiting to pull out and went nose to tail in case, heaven forbid, someone got in front of them in the queue to leave.

    I’m glad that everything went pretty well with your operation. Thanks for writing about your the post-op experiences as it was really enlightening, even if the thought of dilating does make me feel a little bit squeamish.

    • 5

      janefae said,

      Thanks for the thoughts.

      There is also a good mathematical rationale for sit and wait, which is much the same reason as why you stay put if someone is looking for you. Can’t quote chapter and verse, but…my understanding is that the probability of being found if you stay put is higher than if you search.

      On parking, you cannot increase your overall probability of finding a space by driving around: in fact, you probably lower it. It just makes the fidget tendency feel better. 🙂

      Otherwise, the key point i was making was the zen of parking, as opposed to the tactics. Stay calm. Be patient. Love your fellow motorist – even when s/he is acting like an a’hole.

      Oestrogen helps. 🙂


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