…the things you never had

Pink ribbons.
Golden hair.
Fairy wings.

Teasing muddy boys.

Dancing for the fun of it.

Teenage angst – and period pains.
Boy friends. Girl friends. Best friend.
Anticipation.
Tingling passion.

First kiss. First love. First fuck.
Wee-stained fingers:
waiting for the thin blue line.

Going steady.
Breaking up.
Counting calories.
Growing.
Blooming.

Womanhood.

First job.
Oafish goatish boss.
Outrageous sexism.
Solidarity.

The One.

Heavy sweaty pregnancy.
Childbirth.
Motherhood.

Memories.

Most of all,
You’ll never miss
The memories
Good and bad:
The times you’ll live again.

Again.

Again.

And those you wish you never had.

The best it gets
Is might-have-been
The past seen mistily
Through wayward wistful tears

7 Responses so far »

  1. 3

    slpmartin said,

    A very beautiful verse and so well said.

  2. 4

    Halle said,

    So well captured Jane. I have never been a great lover of poetry… but as we know, things change.
    Thank you for summing it all up. Yes, sometimes best-it-gets is might have been.

    Hugs, Halle

  3. 5

    Zoe Brain said,

    Yes.

    But we took the road less travelled, and saw and did things most women don’t.

    Of the two, I really don’t know what I’d prefer. My head says one thing, my heart another.

    So why did your verse leave me in tears, longing with all my soul for things that were never in my destiny?

    • 6

      janefae said,

      Oh. This made me smile – as it probably shouldn’t have – reminding me of a line from that kitschest of kitschy ballads “Never been to me”, by Charlene.

      Its the bit where she sings:

      “I’ve been undressed by kings and I’ve seen some things that a woman ain’t supposed to see”.

      I do know that’s the correct line…but my ever-so-slightly perverse mind always remembers it as:

      “I’ve undressed some kings and I’ve seen some things that a woman ain’t supposed to see”.

      It makes me imagine that underneath the regal robes, the kingly physique is subtly, royally different from that of us mere mortals.

      Surely not! 🙂

      jane
      xx

  4. 7

    Cynthia Lee said,

    **sigh
    **cry

    If only….


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