Roles reversing? (and other stuff)

Is it possible that we – my partner and i – are getting off on the transition process?  or has it just opened doors that were always closed before.

today, se asked whther i had always been this soft… physical… affectionate.  Yes, i think:  but i have always been afraid to let it out.

Whatever the reason, it seemsto be working wonders for our relationship: it really feel like we are finding each other afresh; even… falling in love again.

As for “that look”.  i think it would be embarrassing to the nth degree to say any more than that it was the scariest,and maybe sexiest, moment i have known in our relationship. 

you looked at me: you spoke to me last night; and for a moment i was utterly, utterly lost.  you seem, suddenly, to have found a powe (over me) that you never had before.

jane

4 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Dennis said,

    When people are happier in their own skin everything in the world is better. It is hard to be close to someone who shuts some of themselves away because you are only close to the parts of them available. Even just speaking to you both separately I am hearing a new delicate love in your voices and words I have never witnessed between you before. Ah Jane I have been so worried about you in the few months preceeding this and it’s wonderful to see not only you starting to blossom and thrive but your relationship with a as you rediscover each other.

  2. 2

    Wonderer said,

    I’m sure Dennis is right. But then Dennis knows you two far better than I do.

    How wonderful, to feel able to be what you wanted to be, and to find such acceptance, and a fertile ground for exploration.

    This world is new to me. I earlier wondered whether out paths might grow closer and whether I might have met John. Now I never will; not John as John. And because it is new to me, outside my experience, I wonder whether I’m going to find myself to be unreconstituted; whether I shall say the wrong thing or worse think in the wrong way. It is all intended with respect and I am open to learning.

    So, having said all that, I’ll stick my neck out now. Why didn’t the washing up wreak havoc with your hands before? Have your hands changed? Or your sense of how they should look? Or is it that John never did any washing up?🙂

    • 3

      janefae said,

      Now its remarks like that that WILL have me up in arms.

      About 95% of the household washing up was done by me before…and looks like it will continue to be. Ditto ironing.

      If it weren’t for the fact that i need to earn money to keep the household afloat, i could so easily see myself sinking into the role of a much more trad housewife.

      The thing that has changed is nail varnish – which really does not like long immersion in hot soapy water, or abrasion with the pan scourer.


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